Will This Ever Be Over?

Written by Pam Chambers Be first to comment on this post.

The speaker is captivating. You avidly take notes and agree with your neighbor that this is a great talk. You wish it could go on forever. But then it does.

Dont let this be you. Your popularity will plummet with each moment you steal. People dont want to walk out on you, and usually they wont. But they may conclude that you have lost track of time, didnt plan effectively, are in love with the sound of your voice, orworsedont respect their time.

There are several solutions: Set a timer within view. Ask for someone to give you a time signal. Pack your talk with room to spare. Be willing to dump content if necessary. But DO end on time, and be the last to leave the room in case people want to speak with you afterwards.

Choose the Right Channel

Written by Pam Chambers Be first to comment on this post.

Some people explain that they are “too self-conscious” to speak in front of others. My response is, “You’re right. You’re too self-conscious.” People seem slightly taken aback when I say this, but it’s true.

Your brain can be on only one channel at a time. There are three to choose from.

  1. The Me Channel: When you are on this channel, you are thinking only about yourself. “How’s my hair? Did I wear the right outfit? What should I do with my hands? What if I don’t know the answer?”
  2. The Them Channel: This is much better. This channel allows you to focus on the audience. What causes them to lean in? When do they start taking notes? That man has a question on his face. Find out what he’s wondering. When you are on this channel, self-consciousness is not possible.
  3. The Us Channel: This is the ideal channel. Think of it as a seamless circuit. You put an idea out there. You see a response. You respond to that response. They respond to that response. This creates the wonderful state of “Us-ness.”

Choose the right channel.

When Did Speaking in Front of Others Become Uncomfortable?

Written by Pam Chambers Be first to comment on this post.

Probably not last month, or last year, but when you were in grade school. You had to get up in front of the class and give an oral book report, or describe your science project. Perhaps for the first time in your young life, your friends became your enemies. You flubbed a word. Someone snickered. Your face turned red. More people snickered. Your mind went blank. Your teacher frowned and told you to continue. Bam! You made a decision: This is not safe. And forever after, memories such as these were linked to being in front of people.

In my classes, people ask, What am I so afraid of? Normally Im a confident person! I think at the bottom of this fear lies the horrendous thought that you might be so unacceptable, make such a fool of yourself, and be so unrespectable, that you might as well pack up and leave town. The city would be abuzz about how awful you were. Most basic, you might be abandoned – left to circulate through the universe, outcast and alone.

Sounds melodramatic, but people nod in agreement when I describe it this way. What can you do if you have a presentation in the near future?

  1. Tell yourself the truth about how you think and feel.
  2. Realize that that was then, and this is now.
  3. Discover a desire to share your message. How will it help people?
  4. Know your subject, and if possible, love your subject.
  5. Clarify your intended result and call for action.
  6. Figure out what to wear.